Friday, October 24, 2008

It's Been ONE Horrible Week

One week ago today, my precious Weber was put down. I wish I could say it's getting easier, but it isn't. The grief is so overwhelming at times that I can hardly function. I feel so guilt ridden about euthanizing him. I know he was sick, but I can't seem to get past that. I am reading a book on "Saying goodbye to the pet you love" and it is at least helping me sort through my emotions. It suggested that I write a journal about Weber and the great memories I have of him. I am going to start a second blog just for that. It will be a tribute to my boy and hopefully will help in my healing.

On top of that, Baxter is grieving as well. He is sluggish, lethargic, and not very happy. He does play ball and loves going on several walks, but he still goes to the bedroom and looks for Weber. The vet said it can take about a month for him to get his mojo back. He is eating and drinking properly, but his poo is not solid. Stress, I guess. When any of you see him, give him lots of positive attention. He responds well to that.

Lastly, I found out about my ankle. I have a major decision to make and I am not making it lightly. To put it bluntly, I can live with my ankle as is, it won't get any better, but may get worse. Or I can have a third surgery that SHOULD help. Tim thinks I should have the surgery. I am not sure I can go through that again. Luckily I have until Nov 11 to let the dr know what I'm doing. I am not in amy emotional shape to make that decision now. I'll keep you posted.

Once again, I want to thank everyone who has given me so much love a support this past week. It helped more than I can say. While I am no where near through my grief, the encouragement is helpful. Tim has been a rock. I don't know how he is keeping it together. He needs to to be strong because Baxter needs that and I am a mess and can't provide that to him at the moment. If anyone has any advice as to how I can move on from this, please pass it on to me.

I came across this picture of Weber. He looks so young and healthy. That's the way I choose to remember him. I love you my Weber.

2 comments:

Helene said...

I think the journal is a great idea. That way you will have a chance to allways remember the good times. Mike and I have you guys in our thoughts. When you take Baxter on a walk, check out our new tree.

Lothian said...

I think Baxter is grieving and is also upset because you are so upset. I really think talking to someone may help, you can't keep beating yourself up over this honey. If you need me, you know I am here.